Is There Benefit in Self-Criticism?

“You do not need to dig a hole for you by beating yourself over the head over what’s wrong in order to give birth to what’s right.” ~Abraham-Hicks

How many times do we beat ourselves up and criticize ourselves?  How many times do we dig a hole and throw ourselves in because we punish ourselves for something we did or didn’t do to suit ourselves or others?

How long will we keep choosing to suffer under our own hand because we’ve judged something wrong or bad?

Even if we don’t physically beat ourselves, our self-talk is suffering enough!  Why do we judge ourselves so harshly?  Does it maybe come down to the belief that we’re just not good enough?

Brow-beating ourselves with critical self-talk will never bring about the good that we desire.  Punishment of self does not bring good into our lives.  We cannot get to a better life by punishing ourselves.

Maybe it’s time to let go of our perceived right and wrong actions; good and bad; righteous and evil.  Yes, we live in a physical world of contrasts–that’s how we know what we want and what we don’t want.  Contrast bring clarity.  When you see something or experience something that does not make you feel good, you know that is something you do not want.  In contrast to that, you see something or experience something that does make you feel really good–so you immediately know that is what you do want.

Our emotions are simply letting us know in the moment we experience them, if we are in alignment (agreement) or not with what our Inner Being (soul, spirit, inner Source, the eternally expanding part of us) is thinking about the same subject.  If we feel good about what we are thinking, we are in alignment with what our Inner Being knows to be true about us.  If we feel bad about what we are thinking, we are not in alignment or in disagreement with what our Inner Being knows about us.

These feelings/emotions let us easily know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, where we stand in our process of aligning with who we really are (our Inner Being).  Simply paying attention to the way we feel will make life more delightful if we are willing, when we feel a negative emotion, to distract our thoughts from those thoughts and focus our thoughts on more pleasing thoughts that bring relief and a good feeling.

There is no need to suffer endlessly with the feeling of not being enough or that everything you do is wrong.  When you experience these kinds of feelings, you are simply disagreeing with who your Inner Being knows you to be.  You are more than likely trying too hard to please someone else or you have placed entirely too much emphasis on getting the approval of others, as if their opinions matter more than yours.

We can never please people all of the time.  We will never be enough for their lack of alignment with their Inner Being.  That’s not our job.  That is the job of Source Energy.  When we try to please someone else over pleasing ourselves, we try to take on the job of Source.  That is an impossible task!  Their alignment and good-feelings are their job.  Each person must do their own vibrational work of alignment with the Source within to be happy and feel good.

We came into this time-space reality from the non-physical (the eternal us) knowing exactly who we really are–powerful creators of our eternal expansion.  We knew we were absolutely unconditional love, pure, positive energy that creates worlds.  We came here to experience the contrast that the physical life offers.  We came to see what we don’t like and what we do like.  This built-in preference mechanism creates rockets of desire shooting into our vibrational escrow account and is held there for us as we find our path of vibrationally matching all that we desire.  When we are happy and feeling good we are in the Vortex and emanating a vibrational matching signal to all that we desire.  This is when we feel really good.

When we feel bad or experience a negative emotion, it simply indicates a misalignment with who we really are–that loving, pure, positive energy of expansion.  Negative emotions do not signal that we are wrong or bad!  Feelings are an indicator of our vibrational energy–not a judgment of who we are permanently!  Feelings change with our thoughts.  When we feel bad we are simply in resistance to all that our Inner Being knows us to be, because our Inner Being has already expanded into all that we desire.  We just need to keep up with all that our Inner Being has already become.  And, we do this by thinking thoughts of pleasure and feeling good.

But, it’s our choice.  Either we can continue to suffer the effects of misalignment or we can choose to think thoughts that match what our Inner Being already knows about us.  You can easily tell what you are thinking, by how you feel.  If you feel good, you know you are in alignment.  If you feel bad, you know you are out of alignment.  It’s just that simple.

So, how do we pick better-feeling thoughts?

How do we get out of this pattern of beating up on ourselves?

Beating up on ourselves never brings about any benefit.  We cannot beat ourselves up hard enough or long enough to get to what’s right for us, as individuals.  We cannot focus on all that is wrong in our lives and expect to see anything that is going right in our lives.  We can’t get to the solution from focusing on problems–or our perceived problems.  They are two different vibrational levels.

Here are a few statements that may help bring you some relief:

I don’t always get stuff wrong.

Sometimes I get stuff right.  Sometimes I’m really proud of myself and it makes me feel pretty darn good.

I only feel like I’m not doing something right when they show their disapproval of me.  When I notice they disapprove it makes me feel so bad.  And, I really want to feel good.

Why should their opinion matter more than my own opinion?  Shouldn’t I have more say about how I feel and that my opinion matters the most?

I really like it when I think I’ve done something I’m proud of.

I used to feel like I did a lot of things right.  I wonder if it’s possible for me to feel that way again?

I know I do things well.  Sometimes I can do things better than others.  And, that feels really good.

I need to stop letting someone else’s opinion or judgment cloud my good feeling when I know I’ve done a job well.

I do have some really positive characteristics.  I can think of these positive aspects about me and my life so far….. (begin to list all the positive aspects and characteristics that you appreciate about you where you are right now).

It would be excellent if you would begin to write in a Journal of Positive Aspects all the good-feeling things that you can think of every day.  Even if you can only think of two or three things that are super simple–like, I love my cat, I really like a warm shower in the morning, I enjoy my morning coffee, etc.  Eventually, you will begin to think of more and more things you love about your life.  That’s the momentum of positive thoughts you want to accomplish so you vibrationally match all that you desire.

The more you focus on positive aspects of your life and what makes you feel good, the more you are aligning with what your Inner Being already knows about you.  When you look for anything long enough, you will eventually start finding it–whether negative or positive.  Your world will begin to shift in subtle, and not so subtle, ways to show you exactly what you are looking for.

So, what are you looking for?

Are you looking for proof that you can’t do anything right?  Or, are you looking for proof that you are a wonderful, magnificent, intelligent, creative, loving being?  Proof will show up for you in either case.  It’s up to you to choose where you’re going to look.

Stop beating up on yourself.  It will never benefit you or anyone around you.  Start praising yourself.  Start looking for proof that you are the pure, positive energy your Inner Being already has become.  Catch up with who you really are and allow more good things and good feelings into your experience!

All is well!

If you enjoyed this blog post, please like, comment and share!  Thanks in advance!

MAP 12-2015 rev

~Mary Ann Pack, YOUR Life & Wellness Coach

PS:  I would love to help you remember who you really are!  If you would like to coach with me, I would love to lock arms with you on your path to an expanded life!!  Email me at or call my direct number (903)227-0273 (please leave a message if I’m unable to answer right away as I may be in a coaching session).

PPS:  I encourage you to learn from my mentor, Abraham-Hicks.  You can also find many videos on YouTube by searching Abraham-Hicks.













Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s